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Mon, Jun. 9th, 2014, 08:06 pm
Facebook Problem

A girl I knew in high school just posted "Any peanut free households out there have any good eating out recommendations?"

And I so want to reply, "just spell the alphabet with your tongue", but her mom or 12year old niece probably reads the thing, and sending her a message saying that wouldn't have the same context and would come off as creepy.

So I record it here. :(

Mon, Sep. 21st, 2009, 09:44 pm
1959 Bel Air versus a 2009 Malibu

Here's a video of a crash test between a '59 Bel Air into an '09 Malibu.

It's just fun to watch crash tests.

Sun, Aug. 23rd, 2009, 09:04 pm
I see dead people, but only out of my right eye...

April-May 2009 062
Originally uploaded by discopete1
Philipa was diagnosed with amblyopia this summer. Her case is not the cross-eyed version, but is instead about 7 diopters farsighted in one eye and normal in the other. Surprisingly, she was the one who pointed it out to us, telling us that it 'looked funny'. We figured it would me something mild until the opthamologist covered her right eye and Philipa could essentially see nothing.

So, she's wearing glasses now, and is currently wearing a patch for four hours a day. She's doing a great job at it, and it only took me about a week to get over seeing my daughter with glasses.

Since she started wearing a patch, it is surprising how many of our neighbors have approached us with concern that she poked it. They're happy to know that we're just exercising her weak eye.

She starts pre-K in the fall, and is very excited. You can see her here doing Wii Yoga!

Sat, Aug. 22nd, 2009, 09:08 pm
Canadian Pizza in Singapore

Among the many banally bizarre things going on in Singapore was "Canadian Pizza". For some reason this was the favorite thing for the Malaysian guys to order, or it was one of the few places to deliver. As far as I could tell, Canadian pizza simply meant 2-4-1, or that's Canadian Pizza's schtick. My favorite pizza from Canadian Pizza is the Mexican pizza, although I do love Hawaiian pizza, which does seem to be more popular in Canada than it is in the United States.

Regardless, I, of course, was pestered by the Indians to explain to them what Canadian Pizza was. Of course, I have no idea, there's nothing special about pizza in Canada except:
-when I was a kid we always loved Pizza Pizza, who are famous for the jingle "9-6-7-11-11, call Pizza Pizza, hey-hey-hey!"
-one of the biggest pizza chains in Canada at the moment is 'Boston Pizza'

I think I should stop now.

Wed, Aug. 19th, 2009, 11:25 pm
What I wore

Shirt: French-cuff blue dress shirt that my brother gave to me. He'd ordered it in Toronto one day from this traveling salesman from Hong Kong who had set up in a room at the Royal York. After taking his measurements, they were pigeoned to his sweat-shop, where they made the neck too tight for my brother, yadda-yadda-yadda, I get 4 custom made shirts.

Cuff-Links: My Grandpa had a lot of these with no cuffs to put them in when he checked into the retirement home. I was the only one with French Cuff shirts (see previous anecdote)

Shoes: I bought these in Germany on a business trip. Having trouble with both German and European sizes, the sales woman and I tried several pairs on, and I left happy. The next day I blew away the plant guy, who was clearly dreading trying to find some appropriate safety shoes for the American, by saying "Size forty-six"

Underwear: my mom raised me in tighty-whities. For one birthday, my sister got me a pair of rainbow-coloured jockey shorts by Joe Boxer. This began my odyssey away from jockeys to boxers (even with a better option, men are slow to discard servicable underwear). This evening, tightish shorts. Tightish because my ass still hasn't dropped despite 35 years. Fortunately, my junk is enormous and makes up for the lack of back.

Jacket: Purchased sponataneously while waiting an absurd amount of time for a table at the Cheesecake factory. Two buttons on one sleeve, four on another...damn the pinch-point in the closet door!

Pants: Banana Republic Outlet at Franklin Mills. Pretty crappy story. Funny thing about pants though, when my sister was in Oxford hanging out with her labmates she told them "Sure I'll go out, but I need to go home and put on pants". She was wearing a skirt. In Britan, pants mean underwear.

Bra: Red Lace, A-cup. It was our 9th anniversary dinner, I had to dress up nice!

PS I haven't written in a long time because all my fingernails were extracted in an effort to collect the Caramilk Secret. I'll never talk.

Mon, Jan. 5th, 2009, 09:08 pm
Calling all gun nuts

This fascinating article describes a study involving how children are affected by their surroundings. In one set of experiments they asked children to pretend to do something with a banana. Inevitably the American children tended to pretend the banana was a gun (73%, with higher numbers in the South), while French children were much more likely (68%) to imagine the banana was a telephone.

The most interesting children were of the Shinka tribe on Zanzibar, who would hold the banana in the air like a moon and sing a traditional love song.

Sat, Jan. 3rd, 2009, 01:36 pm
Rutabaga Girl

Every time I go to Super Fresh I have this fantasy of buying funny-named vegetables and taking them through the self-checkout. I don't know about your grocery store, but my grocery store announces your produce as you pass it through

Move your..Rutabaga.
Move your..Celeriac.
Move your..Escarole.
Move your..Bananas (these aren't part of the fantasy, but I do need to get some bananas)
Move your..Arugula
Move your..Kumquats"

The dishy lady one aisle over turns to me, arches her eyebrow and askss, "CUM-quats?"

"No...KUMquats," I correct her.

(and to think, at Whole Foods no one batted an eye.)

I help her load her groceries into her van, stow the seats, and get freaky with her doggy-style.

Sat, Aug. 30th, 2008, 08:40 am

I took this picture while in Singapore, it was part of an anti-crime set of posters and by far the most amusing.

I love look the woman is giving the pervert, to me it elevated the message beyond nanny-state finger-wagging. Her palpable sense of 'what a loser' tells a better message about why you shouldn't try this on the subway than the policeman putting you away for life for coping a feel.

There's a lot more tell about my trip, but this poster captures the city's mood. If you want to hear more, take me out to dinner.

Wed, May. 28th, 2008, 08:49 pm

Out at lunch at the Olive Garden, our waiter started shredding parmesan on our salad, telling us to "Say when!"

"When," I said, expecting him to stop. My lunchmates laughed, but the guy kept shredding. "OK, that's enough" I finally had to tell him.

Everybody at the table thought my "When" joke was hilarious. To me, that joke dates back to when I was 10! Did that never make it south of the border? What did you guys say at summer camp for laughs?

Reminds me of "Born on a Pirate Ship", the Barenaked Ladies album cover. I figured everyone got that, but apparently it was lost on most of the people outside of Toronto.

Tue, May. 13th, 2008, 04:20 pm
Speaking of Cougars at Karaoke

evelynne came to the zoo with me and the kids this Saturday. She's got all the good pictures, and I'll probably edit with one or two of them. But that's not really the point. She made a comment that struck me.

"The zoo can be a little depressing when you read the blurbs about how this animal or that slug is about to go extinct in the wild."

"Yes," I sagely replied, "When you go through the cat exhibit, it's all about how lions are killed, there are two leopards left in all of russia, and tigers are ground up into aphrodesiacs. And then you get to the puma exhibit, and they want you to take one home, there're so many of the freaking things."

If you'd like to learn more about the Puma/cougar/mountain lion, consult your local Wikipedia!

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